


Lost and Found

by rome_in_asia



Category: K-pop, The Boyz (Korea Band)
Genre: Anal Sex, Angst, It has plot, M/M, Oral Sex, Shameless Smut, Smut, Soft-ish, kinda toxic, so there
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-09
Updated: 2018-10-09
Packaged: 2019-07-28 12:13:08
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,871
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16241387
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rome_in_asia/pseuds/rome_in_asia
Summary: Chanhee is lost and that's okay because Juyeon always finds him.





	Lost and Found

**Author's Note:**

> don't like this shit don't read it, it's simple ♡

The days and nights all seem to blend into just this big mess that is Chanhee's life. He's lost himself trying to find what was missing, slipped on the proverbial cliff when he was trying to run away from the plunge. The stars in the skies are the same as the city lights at 2 A.M. on the streets anyway.

Changmin was calling him, he knows. His phone was vibrating like hell in his jacket pocket, but Chanhee didn't answer. What would he tell Changmin? Hey sorry for being such a mess I'm currently in the streets trying to get hit by a car. Did you feed the fish? It made him feel bad to make Changmin and the rest of his band (do they know?) worry, but Chanhee...

He's just feeling a little bit too much.

He continued walking down the brightly-lit streets, thinking, over thinking, whatever. It's not like he can stop his thoughts anyway. It's like a whole train running at full speed and the brakes are slashed so there's no way to stop. You just get hit.

Splattered messily on the train tracks, exactly like how Chanhee was feeling. He feels like he's all over the place yet at the same time he's just... there. It feels weird, to be displaced from your body yet stuck in there all the same. Chanhee let out a sigh, even he doesn't understand what the fuck was going on.

"Oh thank fuck I finally found you!" someone grabbed him just as he was about to cross the street during a green light. The hand was familiar, big and soft but hard, wrapping around his upper arm, yanking Chanhee away from road and back onto the sidewalk.

"Juyeon?"

"Why weren't you answering our calls? Changmin's chewing his nails to the point they bled." Juyeon. Warm and naive and kinda stupid but perfect Juyeon. Juyeon who was holding him tightly and securely and who smelled like apples.

"I'm sorry." Chanhee sniffed, looking away.

"Hey, hey. It's okay. Don't worry, nothing happened." Juyeon let Chanhee cling to him, let him bury his head on Juyeon's neck. "Do you want to go back to the dorm now? Or we could catch a cab and just stay at my home. It's near. Ish."

Chanhee stayed silent, just resting on Juyeon's chest.

"Okay, we'll go to my house then. Hang on, I'll just let the guys know." Juyeon hailed a cab down. He let Chanhee go first then followed in the back seat, telling the driver where to go. The taxi smelled like artificial cherries and worn leather, and the windows tinted just enough to make the bright lights outside dim to a dull purple.

Chanhee watched the buildings pass by, watched time around him, around them, warp and consume.

"Yeah, I've got him. He's okay--Changmin, I said he's okay." Juyeon sounded frustrated. "Pass the phone back to Younghoon please. Yes, hyung. We're going to my house, on a taxi now, actually. Please just tell Jacob-hyung and Sangyeon-hyung we'll be back tomorrow... what? Oh, no. No, I haven't asked."

Chanhee brought his knees up to his chest, knowing what Juyeon meant. He was going to ask Chanhee why he ran from the dorm. Please don't ask me. Please don't ask me. Please don't ask me. Please--

"Are you crazy? No, I'm not going to ask him that now, Jaehyun." Juyeon laid a comforting hand on Chanhee's back, gently rubbing in small circles. "Also, hey, can you pass the phone to Hyunjoon? Great. Hi, Hyunjoon-ah, can you please hide the spare key I have of my house away from Eric and Sunwoo? Yeah, I trust you enough to know you won't barge into my home tonight, unlike those two. They're in my shoebox."

The call ended soon after, but Juyeon's hand on Chanhee's back never left. Even after the cab stopped and Juyeon paid. They stood in front of the door, and when Juyeon had to let go to retrieve the spare key from under the mat, Chanhee felt the window rush around him. The cold seeped through his cardigan, and he shivered.

"My parents are in Ilsan right now for the flower festival." Juyeon explained once the door was open. He led Chanhee inside and shut the door, kicking his shoes off before stilling. "Fuck."

Chanhee looked at the other boy, confused and surprised at the sudden curse.

"I forgot. Shit, Chanhee, I'm sorry I forgot the heater in here's broken. Mom said she's buying a new motor for it but they're still out of town--"

"It's okay." Chanhee reassured in a small voice. Juyeon looked guilty as hell, which pinched at something in Chanhee's heart, making him reach out to give Juyeon's hand a squeeze. "It's all good."

"I'll make you hot cocoa." Juyeon smiled, and the simple quirk of his pink lips left Chanhee warm. "Leave your shoes here, okay? I'll be in the kitchen."

Though he's been at Juyeon's place many times before, always with the other boys, Chanhee never loses his interest in it. The walls were a welcoming shade of creamy brown, like coffee foam, and the smell was woodsy and familiar. There were bookshelves everywhere, and Chanhee couldn't help but feel like it was a sanctuary, safe from the hurricane of timelapses happening on the other side of the door.

In the kitchen, Juyeon was already done. He was holding two mugs of hot cocoa with marshmallows, one of which he handed over to Chanhee. "Careful. It's hot." he warned, almost whispering in the silence of the house. "It's weird, the place being so silent. Usually you can hear Big Bang coming from my brother's room."

He didn't press for Chanhee to reveal why he ran. Juyeon even showed him the Hello Kitty stuffed toys placed around the house, telling Chanhee where he got each of them, and why. Their hot chocolate finished, Juyeon left the mugs in the sink, and ushered Chanhee towards his old bedroom.

"You can sleep here. I'll take the co--"

"Can we share your bed instead?" Chanhee asked.

Juyeon gave him an odd look. "Yeah. Sure. Do you want to change into more comfortable clothes? Pajamas, maybe?" Chanhee had nodded, and Juyeon handed him a random pair and took out one for himself. Chanhee decided to change in the bathroom, folding his clothes as neatly as he could and slipping into Juyeon's clothes.

It was a simple white shirt, too large on Chanhee considering Juyeon's broad shoulders, and a pair of light green pajamas. He vaguely remembered Juyeon saying light green was his favorite color. Chanhee pushed the thought away and went back into the bedroom, where Juyeon was already waiting in.

"You need to eat more, Channie. You're so small." Juyeon said, patting the space next to him. The bed was small and the sheets smelled like fabric conditioner, unused and new. Chanhee found himself gently pressing his lips onto Juyeon's, feathery and barely-there.

"I'm sorry." Chanhee whispered.

Juyeon sat up, pulling him back in for a more passionate kiss. He tasted like chocolate and sugar, Chanhee noted, letting Juyeon deepen the kiss. Their tongues met, clashing but Chanhee let Juyeon have dominance. He simply slid a leg over Juyeon's, straddling him. The older boy let out a groan of approval at the action.

Being cocooned in Juyeon's arms was not a new experience for Chanhee. Their band was close, very close to each other. Chanhee associated some color from each member's hug, along with a burst of emotions from the tangling of limbs.

Sangyeon's was brown, warm and safe. Jacob's was minty green, protective and calming. Younghoon's was purple, soft and velvety. Hyunjae's was terra cotta, welcoming and tight. Kevin's was chartreuse, bold and sharp. Changmin's was bright yellow, sweet and cheerful. Haknyeon's orange was energizing and optimistic. Hyunjoon's fiery red was passionate and dynamic. Sunwoo's blue is electric and rare. Eric's was coral and soft.

Chanhee's favorite has always been Juyeon's neutral gray.

"More." Chanhee whimpered, feeling Juyeon leave his lips to nip at his collarbone. "Juyeon, please."

"Are you sure? You're not--"

"I need this. Please."

Juyeon looked him straight in the eye. "Tell me if I'm hurting you, okay?" he leaned forward to peck his lips again, softly, afraid to cause pain. Chanhee nodded, desperate. Juyeon took their shirts off and let Chanhee shimmy out of his borrowed pajamas.

They are no strangers to each other's nudity, as is normal when you live in a dorm with eleven other people and only three bathrooms. Chanhee let out a sigh as Juyeon's hands roamed on his body, resting his chin on the older's head as Juyeon left kisses on his chest. What was new was Juyeon touching him, soft and hard edges blurring out into just _Juyeon Juyeon Juyeon._

Chanhee let out a soft, soft moan when Juyeon grabbed his cheeks and spread them apart.

"You can be as loud as you want. It's only us in here." Juyeon reminded, seemingly amused. He reached over to retrieve a bottle of lube from his nighstand, letting Chanhee settle on his lap, both of them watching over Chanhee's shoulder as Juyeon uncapped the bottle and warmed some lube on his fingers.

"Juyeon--" Chanhee's jaw dropped at the feeling of a finger probing inside of him. At the back of his mind, Chanhee wondered how Juyeon knew how to prep... has he tried it on himself? On one of their bandmates? On strangers? The thought of unfamiliar hands sent Chanhee reeling, and the tell-tale signs of anxiety gnawed on his bones.

"Hey, hey. Are you okay? Did I hurt you?" Juyeon suddenly asked, pulling his fingers out. Chanhee was crying, a quiet sort of cry, the one he has perfected because he doesn't want anyone in the dorm to hear. Juyeon cupped Chanhee's face gently, wiping the tears away with his thumbs. "Chanhee?"

Once again, how could Chanhee have answered that?

"Chanhee."

Words have never been his strongest suit. He always came off as haughty or mean, even when he didn't mean to. Chanhee felt the world slipping out from his feet as he stared at Juyeon's wide, concerned eyes. Maybe...

Maybe he should just...

"Chanhee?"

He dived in for another kiss, deeper, more hungry. Chanhee pushed their tongues together, wanting nothing more than to disappear. Juyeon let him, pushing back slightly, angling his head to deepen the kiss. It was messy, wet, and quiet. The silence defeaned Chanhee, and he let out a whimper when Juyeon went back to prepping him.

Juyeon was muttering something on his lips, mumbling words into the kiss but Chanhee doesn't understand. He pulled on Juyeon's short hair, ripping out a groan from the older boy, and suddenly, maybe Chanhee wanted nothing more than hear them again.

Chanhee liked neutral gray.

It was impressive. Steadfast.

Juyeon found his prostate and Chanhee _screamed_ , letting Juyeon silence him right after with another sloppy kiss. It didn't seem to matter that the heater wasn't working, Chanhee dazedly thought at the back of his mind. Chanhee found himself moving on his own, fucking down on Juyeon's fingers, his own fingers digging bruises onto the other's shoulders.

"Think you can handle the real thing now?" Juyeon asked, ever so sweet, ever so caring. Chanhee's eyes fluttered open, nodding. Juyeon removed his fingers and pulled down his own pajamas, which were already wet with mixing precum and lube.

"I can-- I'll do it." Chanhee's voice was raspy and breathy. He braced himself, one hand on Juyeon's chest, the other gently grasping the older boy's dick. Juyeon let out a grunt at the contact, moaning quietly when Chanhee trailed a finger on its underside before lining up and slowly, so, so slowly sinking down.

"Ah-- _fuck_." Juyeon threw his head back, the heat overwhelming. Chanhee felt powerful at the moment, watching Juyeon's adam's apple bob with every gulp he takes, watching a bead of sweat trail down from his jaw to his neck. Chanhee leaned forward, tonguing at the small drop.

"You can't cum before I do." Chanhee whispered, breathing down on Juyeon's ear, beginning to move his hips. He held Juyeon down, head thrown back as he rode him forcefully. Chanhee could hear his own moans bordering on loud whimpers, creating some sort of harmony with Juyeon's grunts and cursing.

"Chanhee," Juyeon groaned amidst the deafening slapping of skin. "God, _please_."

Chanhee didn't understand what Juyeon meant, but he ran his hands down the other's body, rolling Juyeon's hardened nipples between his fingers and causing the older to buck into him, hitting deeper and Chanhee felt perfect. It was definitely not the answer to any of his wordless questions that made him run, but it was a good alternative.

A toxic one, but it was something.

"Fuck." Chanhee cursed, swivelling his hips in a way he didn't know he could. He wasn't the best dancer, his hips weren't built like Jacob's, but it was enough for Juyeon to groan out a loud ' _shit_ ' and let a hand cover his flushed face.

The familiar heat started to burn in Chanhee's body, setting him on fire. Juyeon squirming under him, Chanhee wanted to make him feel the same, burning with every touch, with every nudge to Chanhee's prostate.

"Juyeon, I'm--" Chanhee came, on Juyeon's stomach, untouched and Juyeon might have cursed a little too loudly at the sight of Chanhee concaving towards him, eyes closed and damp with sweat. Juyeon reached for him, melding his fingers on the spaces of Chanhee's ribs, maybe trying to reach his heart.

Chanhee steadied his breathing, riding his orgasm out with gentle movements of his hips before shakilly pulling off. Juyeon was still hard, still so big and proud and leaking, but he was waiting for Chanhee. It must be painful, Chanhee thought, waiting like that.

"You can't touch." Chanhee slapped Juyeon's hands away from where it had started to pump his dick. Juyeon looked surprised at the dominance but with the way his member twitched, Chanhee knew it wasn't something to worry about.

He positioned himself in between Juyeon's legs, gaining so much confidence, so much more than he ever had, and took the tip of the throbbing cock into his mouth. Juyeon let loose a half-scream, half-groan at the wet and half relief, tangling his fingers into Chanhee's hair. The younger, annoyed, pulled the hand away.

"I said _no touching_." Chanhee reiterated. "Or you won't cum."

Juyeon swallowed back a moan as he nodded, watching Chanhee go down on him again. The younger pushed Juyeon's legs apart, taking the abandoned lube from the side of the bed and slicking his fingers up, still kitten-licking on the Juyeon's dick.

 _One_. Chanhee sucked at the tip, pushing his first finger into Juyeon's ass. Juyeon bucked his hips upward, hands grabbing at the blankets. Chanhee gave him a little smile, or tried to, anyway.

"God, I didn't think it'd feel that great." Juyeon panted as Chanhee began to move his finger, making sure to rub the walls and making Juyeon _keen_. Chanhee took him deeper into his throat, going for two fingers, and Juyeon _whined_. "I'm going to cum--"

"Down my throat? Is that where you want to cum?" Chanhee pulled off with a pop, hastilly moving his hand up and down Juyeon's dick. "Where do you want to cum, Juyeon-ah?"

It must have been the way Chanhee's voice dropped to a sultry tone, or how Chanhee added another finger in, or even just the way Juyeon had always found Chanhee beautiful, but it came crashing down to a high as Juyeon cummed, thick ropes of white hitting Chanhee's cheek and covering his hand.

"Fuck. I'm sorry, I--"

"Don't mind it." Chanhee pulled away, watching his partner pant heavily. He feels better, so to speak, compared to his initial state earlier that night. Juyeon watched him with those dark eyes, sat up, and wiped his cum off Chanhee's face with his hand.

"Do you want to shower? It's going to be freezing cold though." Juyeon offered, wiping them both carefully and gently with hia discarded shirt. "Hey, uh, are you okay now? Did that help?"

Chanhee stayed silent, contemplating his answer. Juyeon didn't press on, finishing up and throwing his soiled shirt to the ground, pulling the younger boy towards him and under the blankets.

"Can we do this again?" Chanhee asked in a soft voice as he rested his head on Juyeon's shoulder. Juyeon's hand that had been drawing circles on Chanhee's back stilled for a moment, then resumed.

"Will you top me next time? You're a hot dominant, you know that?" Juyeon grinned, but Chanhee couldn't see it. "We can do this whenever you need to, Chanhee. Just tell me, and we'll do something. And when you're ready, you can tell me anything, okay?"

So maybe Chanhee still feels like he's spilled all over the train tracks, like his being is small and big at the same time. Maybe sometimes the sun and the moon are looking the same and instead of the stars he wishes on the headlights of passing cars.

But if it gets too much, he could always count on Juyeon to find him.

**Author's Note:**

> twitter: [@.juyeonieee]
> 
> have a nice dayyy


End file.
